Day 69 - That damn fat lady sang

I hate every moment of sitting here writing this post.
Not because I hate to blog...but it's over...She sang....
That damn fat lady sang and it's over...for now.

I wish I could have bottled up the feelings and vibes that I encountered as I walked to the stadium from the parking garage.

The atmosphere was amazing! Everything felt like it was as big, if not bigger than it was during the All-Star Game festivities.

Enough of this blah, blah, blah....STORIES!

Now you'd think that with the final game, there'd be some amazing stories...well, you're right...sort of...there was at least one amazing moment during this final game of the '09 season.

-I walked to the top of a section and a lady in the top row asked for a beer. She looked like she was in her mid-to-late-40's and (who I can only assume to be her husband) was standing behind her. I gave her her beer and then she realized she needed to pay me. She seemed to act a little funny after I handed her the beer. She started to fumble through her pocket and pull out everything but money. She began to talk about how she thought she had some money in her pockets...She emptied out of her pockets a half-dozen receipts, some car keys, chapstick, fingernail clippers and a few quarters. Finally she found a few $1's and then her husband (who I could tell was frustrated/embarrassed by this woman) stretched out his hand with a $10 in it. I gave him back his change while the woman continued to search for money...she was talking to herself...as if she was encouraging herself to find money.

A few innings later I was walking back up to the top of that same section when I noticed this same woman start to walk back to her seat. As she started to sit down, she wobbled back and forth a bit...then gravity decided to her...she fell straight to the floor. She snapped back up and sat back into her seat. As her husband helped her sit upright, he just shook his head ashamed of what just took place. I was right there in front of her and immediately asked her if she was alright. She kept saying over and over again, "I'm Fine!" as if she needed to remind herself.

I followed protocol...alerted the closest usher and other beer men about the intoxicated cougar at the top of section 248.

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Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that unneeded reinforcements were brought in for the game. About 8 beer men from Chicago were brought into our commissary. These guys from Chicago were beer men at Soldier Field. About 50 more people were brought in from the military base in Ft. Leonard Wood to work throughout the stadium. I guess they were expecting a big crowd or something.

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After completing a sale, I tell the beer-drinking fan, "thank & enjoy the game." I had several instances when the fans would return with a, "yeah...well, we're trying to" or a "if we had a few more runs we will." Then towards the end of the game, fans would realize that this was it. The season was over after this game if we were to lose. Then they'd realize that this was potentially my last day of working too. A few fans asked what was next for me. "Are you going to work Blues or Rams games?" I laughed when they asked about Rams games. Then I'd tell them how I just accepted a temp job. I'll be in charge of an email marketing campaign and will be doing that till the end of '09. They would usually just say the usual, 'good luck with that' or 'see you next season'.

Hmmmm....next season...return as a beer man?...well that will be covered in a blog in the near future.

As for the end of this game, this season...it has been an amazing time.

I will post a few more blogs over the next 2 weeks...reflecting on different things that I never talked about during the season...as well as a special Cards/Cubs tribute blog.

So, until later on again this week, thank you faithful readers. It's been an amazing time!...just wish that fat lady could have waited to sing on another day.

Totals for 2009 season:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks (at $3.50/bag = $255.50)
167 Bottles of Water (at $5/bottle = $835)
293 Bags of Peanuts (at $4/bag = $1172)
4564 Bottles of Beer (at $7.75/bottle = $35,371)
Grand Total for 2009 sales: $37633.50
(no, I did not make that much money, just a small commission of it)

Day 60 - Disrespectful Rat

I've worked in several restaurants and a fast food establishment over my time...and I'll share a secret...no matter how much you clean and spray for bugs/rodents...I remember working at a McDonald's throughout my high school career and how there would be mice and roaches in the building throughout the 4 years of my time there. Several of the restaurants I worked at had mice too. No matter how many traps would be set, mice would find a way in and find food.

Busch stadium is an open building...there are several parts of the stadium that are enclosed....but for the most part, a mouse could make his way throughout the stadium and feast on spilled cracker jacks and peanuts.

While in my commissary, they noticed a box that had a hole on the bottom side of it, which looked like it was created by the edge of the box being dropped on the edge of a counter. The further it was inspected, it was noticed that there were "shavings" of the box on the ground around it. Yes. A mouse made his home in a box of cracker jacks. Guess who was standing there when the box was discovered and was asked to move the box away from the wall...yeah, this guy.

After moving the box, it was opened up and come to find out, the suspect had only chewed into one bag of cracker jacks. The entire box was still thrown out and everyone had to inspect their peanuts and cracker jacks. Everything was wiped down and sanitized before leaving our commissary, so don't worry about finding a bonus prize in your cracker jacks...everything is inspected before leaving our commissary. The suspect was still at large at the time of this blog and no mice were harmed during the creation of this blog.

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After being surprised by the few amount of tv stations covering the 8th anniversary of the attacks of 9/11, I figured that there would at least be a moment of silence observed at the stadium tonight. There was a moment of silence observed and it was the quietest I've ever heard Busch Stadium. It was very eerie feeling.

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As an employee of Sports Services, we are required to stop what we are doing, remove our hats and observe the singing of 'God Bless America' and the National Anthem. Some of the guys in the commissary have vocalized how they don't think they need to sing 'God Bless America' at every game, but still follow the rules and out of respect observe the song. There is one guy who won't even go out into the stands till both songs are completed because of his feelings against them being sung.

Last night, while I was standing behind section 251, the singing of 'God Bless America' was about to start. I took my hat off and stood there. As the song started, I could hear a beer man ask people move out of the way so he could get through. For starters, he wasn't following the rules and he was being disrespectful to the fans. I made his way up the steps to the area he usually sells in and was out of site while 'God Bless America' was finishing up...never once stopping.

As the songs were completed, myself and another beer man had numerous complaints from fans in that section, saying how it was very disrespectful and weren't happy with that beer man. Not trying to be a tattle-tail, but also being very pissed at this, I reported what happened to our supervisor and decided to let the beer man be dealt with by them.

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I had a guy who was sitting in one section that seemed like he was from a part of the U.S. that didn't have running water, electricity or know what baseball was...he was about as a backwards redneck as I've ever seen. He had a few random teeth missing in his smile, smelled like a rotten egg and had a twang in his voice that had to of been made up.

During the play at the plate when Holliday was called out...this man must have thought that he was an umpire....he stood up and was screaming at the top of his lungs. He was letting the umpire know that he made a bad call and they needed to update their benefits that covered vision because he needed glasses. The group of college students in front of him were encouraging him...so it just kept going on for a bit. The man went on for about the next 5 minutes. I don't think I've really witnessed a fan at Busch go that crazy.

For the record...watched the replay on SportsCenter...he was safe.

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I was carding a guy in one section, saw he was 26, sold him the beer and then looked around to see if anyone else wanted to buy one when the guy sitting across the aisle from him got my attention. He leaned over and said in a quiet voice, "that ID you just checked was fake. You want to know how I know? Because I just sold it to him." Now usually everyone is a comedian at Busch and likes to tell me how everyone's ID is fake. This guy kept a serious look on his face and I just laughed a bit and said I checked it and it was real. He didn't laugh back...I thought, 'well, damn, i'm gonna get fired if that was a fake, but that met all of the requirements of a real ID..." Finally this tool decided to slowly smile back at me. He then went on to ask me how my night was going...but he said it in a way as if he has known me for a few years or something. He carried on a conversation for a few minutes...and then didn't buy a beer from me...bad move dude...you just wasted my time.

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Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
141 Bottles of Water
250 Bags of Peanuts
3799 Bottles of Beer

Day 56, 57 & 58 - Territorial - Bottle Top

So I didn't have any stories worth sharing the past few games...but last night...I had a few dandy ones.

Last night I had a beer man that has been known to do very well in our commissary, come down into a section that I was already in. Now the rules set by our employer states that only 2 vendors per aisle. It has been an unspoken rule between all beer men that if another beer man is down that aisle, he's got that section...it's okay if a food vendor and a beer man are in the same aisle though...just never two beer men....(that's for the sections our commissary covers)...(down lower in the 100's sections, you almost need 2 in an aisle to cover that many people)

I just look up and he was already half way down the steps into my section. I shot him a look and he "then" realized I was down there and walked back up. He's been known to do this before and "take" sales from the top half of a section from the beer man that is already at the bottom of the steps. Not cool. Not cool.

Then, during 'last call' he follows right behind me down one section...not joking, only 4 or 5 steps behind me...Beer man foul! ...I just turn around (not wanting to make a scene) and ask 'what are you doing?' as he is asking a group of guys in the top row if they needed another one and if they were alright'. At that exact moment, the last out was caught, end of the 7th, end of sales.

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Last night, during the bottom of the 6th, I was walking down a section when a guy motioned for a beer. I sold him a beer and he gave me a $8 at first...then handed me another $1. As I was about to head down towards the rest of the section, he asked me something. I couldn't hear what he said because of the roar of the crowd. He leaned in and asked in a mumbling voice, "where is the bottle top for this beer?"

I grabbed into my beer tub and showed him the bottle top. He grabbed it out of my hand and I grabbed it back saying, "I'm sorry sir, we can't give the caps out with the beer." (It's a rule we have to follow by our employer...rarely do I ever have anyone ask for the cap) He looked at me with a funny face and said, "then how about you give me that dollar back." So I gave it back to him.

I walked all of the way down to the end of that section and as I was walking up, the game went into the 7th inning...'last call'. I started to announce this and that same guy who just asked for his dollar back, wanted another beer.

I debated on just walking past him, but thought to myself, it's another sale, even if he doesn't tip me, i'll still be getting commission from that beer. I wait for people to pass by because everyone seemed to need to go to the bathroom or buy beer from the bar at the same time...I finally make it over to that guy. He asks for one beer and say, "here. here is $9 since you got all mad at me earlier." I responded, "sir there is nothing I could have done. We are not allowed to give the bottle cap out with the beer. I'm sorry." He just looked at me with a dumb look on his face...then he said, "you need to just relax man. stop taking your job so seriously." I told him, "thank you and enjoy the rest of the game."

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That's it from last night. Today is another day game. Oh yeah, you know it's business time again!

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
141 Bottles of Water
245 Bags of Peanuts
3586 Bottles of Beer

Day 55 - Worst Best Day Ever!

I wish I could tell you that I make half of this crap up...but it's all true...it's honestly way to crazy to make up....the reason I titled this blog "Worst Best Day Ever!" is because of the events that took place. I had an amazing day in sales, but felt awful for an incident that occurred...read on and you'll understand what I mean.

Yesterday's day game was by far one of the most eventful games I've had in a long time.

I was running late...Since it was a day game, parking was going to be more expensive in the garage I normally park in...have to pay the "day rate" of $10 instead of the $4 for the night price during games....So after trying to figure out where I was going to park and make it into the stadium in time...I parked in the "special" parking lot that employees of Sports Services can park in for a discounted price of something around $6. It is the lot to the southwest of the stadium. We have been told before that if we park there, we can enter the stadium on that street side entrance for employees near gate 3 and walk through the stadium to change/clock-in in the Sports Services lobby.

I walk up to the entrance way and the Busch Stadium employee tells me I can't enter through this door. I explain that I was told at the beginning of the year that we were able to and he just replied back with saying, "yeah, well there's been a problem with that, you need to walk up to that green awning area past gate 3."

So I walk to that entrance he pointed to and the older gentleman behind the door that was shut just looked at me. I showed him my badge and he just motioned for me to keep walking. I tried to tell him through the glass door that I was an employee, showing him my badge again and he just shook his head 'no' and told me to keep walking.

I finally make it around to the other side of the stadium where we I normally enter the stadium...I was a bit ticked at the fact that I was told one thing and was now being told another thing by a different person...it was my own fault for running late...but it wouldn't have been my fault if I wasn't able to clock in because I was late when I was at an entrance I was told I could enter through...frustrating way to start my day off..... I still made it there in time...just a bit frustrated...

With it being a day game, my commissary was closed due to our supervisor having to work at her other job as a school teacher. So the guys that did show up from commissary 240 were split up between commissary 168 & 134. I was assigned to 134 with 2 other guys from 240. We had discussed that since our commissary (240) was closed, there wouldn't be any beer men up on that level in the sections we normally sell in. So we decided that the 3 of us would go up there and rake in the sales!

Before I even got out of the commissary, some of the regular beer men down there were harassing us (240 beer men) as if they were superior beer men for working down there. They were telling us that if we were going to stick around in their sections they would cut down into our sections and take as many sales away from us as possible...most of those guys were just a bunch of barbaric fools if you ask me...I'll explain more later...

Thank God for escalators...this made the trip up to the second level of the stadium much easier...going down, well, we had to take the steps since the escalators closest to us don't go down till the 7th inning.

I had already sold about half of my first case before the game started...I told myself that this was going to be a great day of making some sales since there were only a few of us guys working 25 sections compared to nearly 20 guys working in the 25 sections...

***Before I share this next story...do this: yell the word "peanuts" really loud! If you can't do that right now, do it in your head. Do you hear what that sounded like?***

I was making my way down into a section as people were still coming into the stadium...trying to make a few more sales before the games started...I was yelling out my beer man hawk, "ICE COLD BEER! ICE COLD BUD, BUD LIGHT, BUD SELECT! ICE COLD BEER! PEANUTS!" I had a guy motion for me to come down to him and his buddies...all of them wearing business attire...I thought the guy was asked me for peanuts. He kept looking at me and back to the guy sitting next to him, then back at me with a childish grin...He said, "penis! this guys a penis. you said you have penis? this guy needs one.... I didn't want to buy anything, just wanted to share that with you." I shook my head and walked away. I realized that I need to be sure I enunciate a bit more...or else full grown business men will act like a jr. highers...

*I really struggled with deciding if I was going to share this next story...but here it goes...
Have you ever been so thirsty that you choke when you take a drink of something? Have you had your throat so dry, you want to chug any liquid as fast as you can and as soon as that liquid comes into contact with your throat, you instantly choke or cough?

I was busting my butt off during the heat of the day game when I sat my tub down behind section 251 to quench my thirst. My throat and mouth was so dry from being so hot as well as yelling out my beer call. I twisted off the cap of my Gatorade bottle filled with ice cold water. I noticed that Holliday was up to bat. I paused to watch him hit. I then lifted my Gatorade bottle to my lips and got a huge mouthful of water when at the exact same moment as Holliday hit his homerun, I choked on that ice cold water the moment it came into contact with my throat. I tried to turn my head towards my arm to cover the cough that was coming on. That big gulp of water just became a projectile.

The sold out crowd was on their feet cheering for the solo shot out into left field while I gave the couple sitting in the last row of section 251 a shower. I can only describe it as what it would be like to take a ride on the Maid of The Mist at Niagara Falls. I have never in my entire life felt so bad for what had just happened. I just spit water onto these 2 fans. I immediately apologized. The could see that I was embarrassed, but I don't think they knew how bad I truly felt. The fans were still on their feet and this couple who just had a quick cool-down were still half unsure of what to do. I apologized again and they just said it was okay and then the guy walked off...I didn't know what was gonna happen, I didn't know where he went to...I saw that he came back with some napkins to clean him and his wife off a bit. I apologized again and the lady said it was okay.

Again, I have never felt so bad in my entire life. I could have just caused this couple to never want to come back to a baseball game at Busch Stadium their entire life in fear of getting spit on! I had already made my way into a few sections over, still feeling awful when I decided that I would go back and give them a free beer (even though, I'd be paying for it, it was the least I could do in hopes of kindling our relationship). They were gone. I don't know if they left, if they moved into another section or what, but they weren't back there for the remainder of the game...

*While walking through the amazing air-conditioned Red Bird Club to get to the next section over, I hear someone yell my name. Not just my first name, cause it's not like I don't share a common name or anything...but first and last name. A girl I graduated high school, Jane, with was there with a few of her coworkers. She came over and gave me what was like a semi-side hug...which I personally was thinking to myself, 'I'm fricken drenched in sweat and smelly and she's huggin me?...who wants to hug a beer man?' Then it hit me...'WHO WOULDN'T WANT TO HUG THE BEER MAN!??!?!'

*I was in a section making a few sales when I had a guy in a business suite motion for one beer. He was sitting on the end of the row. He asked for a Bud and then leaned forward to get his wallet out of his pocket. Then there was a loud 'snap'! It sounded like a gun went off right under his seat.... Nope...not a gun, but the sound did come from his seat. He broke his seat. The bottom of the seat catches on the back so it wont' fold down any farther...well this guy (yeah he was an easy 300+ lbs.) snapped the chair past the part that keeps the seat level. He couldn't sit back, cause the bottom of the seat was sloped down and I did everything inside of me from not bursting into laughter from this site. He stood up and snapped the seat back down. He sat back down and looked at me and said, 'let's make that a Bud Light'. I wonder if him switching from Bud to Bud Light will create a flow of events that will inevitably lead him to become the "Jared" of Budweiser?

I've witnessed some amazing things in my days while working at Busch Stadium, but this day game really just topped it off. Sales were amazing! The crowd of business folk were amazing...and some were childish.

As I was going through check-out in 134, the other beer men were acting a bit more childish than that businessman did while asking for a penis for his friend. The beer men were cutting ahead of each other in line, yelling at each other, complaining about how hot it was, trying to cut in front of each other again in the line...they were acting barbaric in the ways they were treating each other. Myself and the other 2 beer men from 240 just kept to ourselves and ended up at the end of the line...I didn't care where I ended up, I had a crazy day.

After waiting in the long line to check-out and after clocking out, I was able to make my way back to my car and head home (hopefully before rush hour traffic hit). Then about half-way back towards the usual parking garage I park in, I realize I parked next to the stadium. Awesome! Well, it wasn't awesome till sitting in traffic for nearly 45 minutes just to get onto the interstate, which took another 45 minutes just to get home...who cares...I witnessed a man break a seat and accidentally gave a couple a shower (which even as I type this, I still feel bad).

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
135 Bottles of Water
227 Bags of Peanuts
3365 Bottles of Beer

Day 53 & 54 - Double Vision?

Double Vision...not just a hit song by Foreigner, but it's what I felt like I had between Tuesday's & Wednesday's games.

Sold nearly the same both nights...actually, I sold the same number of bottles of beer both nights...commission was the same (ok, so there was an $0.08 difference between the 2 nights)....and I only have a few stories from each night...so there ya go...

Tuesday night:

-Thanks to a few people in section 254, I didn't put my knee down into a pile of puke on the end of a row. I guess someone had a bit too much fun and puked. I didn't realize it and noticed people were missing from a row...and when the people in the row behind them asked for a few beers, I started to go into the row with puke and about a half step later and I would have had to buy knee pads...

-It felt like all of the weirdos decided to show up to the game on Tuesday night. I've never seen so many odd people at a ball game before. I had a few groups of people that would fit in the 'goth' category, a large number of elderly people who I found to be sleeping during most of the game (not that a lot happened other than in the first inning), I had a group of kids that decided to have their face be used as a pin-cushion and had more facial piercings than anyone I've ever seen in my life, there was a group of college aged people that kept getting ticked for being carded (if you're just turning 21 or 22 what the hell do you expect?!?!?! i card for anyone 39-1/2 and under suckas!!) Just lots of odd groups of people in my sections tonight.

Wednesday night:

-I busted a knuckle open tonight. At the top row of section 250, there is a counter-top with bar stools that people sit in...with about 4 ft between them and the brick wall. Well, when people stand up, their chair goes back, thus the smaller walk-way to get around them...well, as I was walking through there, I had to squeeze around someone and busted my knuckle open as the brick wall acted like a cheese grater on my skin. AWESOME! I was hoping my gloves would have covered the first knuckle up on my ring finger enough, but it was just at the right spot to catch it...oh the price I pay to get people their beer.

-Ironically enough, in that same section I busted my knuckle...before the game even started, I sold a bag of peanuts to a couple and they started to carry on a conversation with me. They asked if I was ever tired of working there or got tired of baseball...I replied with a "no" I don't think I could ever get tired of it...The more I thought about it, I don't ever see that happening....I mean, I'm getting paid to be at the fricken ballgame! The lady asked if I was exhausted from carrying my beer tub around...I responded with just saying that some games it feels heavier than others and the heat doesn't help some nights. She responded with, "well, you are more of a man than I am." I thought to myself, God I hope so...or you and your husband need to talk!

Day game tomorrow (Thursday). Looking forward to plenty of business men in their business suits and business socks (you know when i'm down to just my socks it's business time that's why they call them business socks...(yeah, i have to say it...(if you don't understand, go here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j94V5u53bLA ) but not that kind of business, cause i ain't gay) buy business beer tomorrow. ...lots of business mena and women at the day games...that's mostly the day game crowd since school has started back up.

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
135 Bottles of Water
224 Bags of Peanuts
3269 Bottles of Beer

The end is near!?!?!....

I've had a few friends ask me recently if I was ready for the season to be over?...If I was prepared for the end of being a beer man.

This took me by surprise.

Am I a beer man for the Cubs or something? If so, I would know my job as a beer man would be over the last day of the regular season...but last time I checked, I work at Busch Stadium! We're in 1st place in the NLCD and that means playoffs. Not to get ahead of myself...but we just pulled ahead of the Cubs by 7 games last night. Playoffs? Me thinks so!

I mean, I guess it is already nearing the end of September and there is just a little over a month left of the regular season...but we are sitting in an amazing spot to be in the PLAYOFFS!!!!

When I first started this season, I knew that the All-Star Game was well worth working at the stadium. Shortly after the All-Star break, I felt like something wasn't the same...I didn't feel as excited to go to work at the stadium...I lost my passion...

Wait...a beer man who has passion for his job?

You better believe it. There's something about going to the stadium and being surrounded by the smells and the sounds of the game. You know what I'm talking about. Seeing a team in a city with deep roots in the American tradition of baseball. I love it! I LOVE MY JOB!

As for being finished after this season...HA! I mean, hopefully I'll have a full-time job by the beginning of the 2010 season and have no need to work as a beer man...BUT...as long as my job schedule would allow for it, I have full intentions of at least working Friday and Saturday games through next season. Why not?!?!? It'd be easy extra money. I use the term "easy" lightly...because of the actual physical labor that is involved with the job. As long as I live in the STL area, I have full intentions of continuing this job...I love it!

The only problem I currently have is not knowing what days we'll be playing in October. Yes, they have the general dates of each playoff round, but not sure when those games will be at Busch...

Day 51 & 52 - Vomit, Locusts & Leather Chaps

On my way out of the stadium on Friday night, I was in a hurry to get around to the other side of the stadium to meet up with a few friends. The sidewalks were crowded and it was tough to maneuver through everyone...then I nearly stepped into a puddle of puke. Vomit was all over the ground...someone must have done a great job of projecting that...cause it had splattered around in a radius of 6-7 feet. Thank God I was looking down...I did see a few people walk right through it...which nearly made me gag. The site/sound/thought of puke makes me gag. It was tough to even write this paragraph...

The heat was harsh on Friday and Saturday night's games. I haven't felt the effects of the heat as bad as I did this weekend. I had to stop every section just about to take a drink and wipe the sweat from my face.

As I was walking out of the parking garage on Saturday, I had a sudden thought in my mind that we were about to be facing plagues of locusts.


I've lived in the country before, but I've never seen a locust as big as this one! It was still there when I got back to the garage Saturday night. I think it waved to me.

After thinking through how having plagues would effect the world today in my head...I was walking through the parking lot next to the stadium where the old stadium used to be...that's when I saw over half of the parking lot full of Harleys. I guess there was some big promotion/sponsor by Harley Davidson for the game. Usually I'll see plenty of fans bring gloves to the games, but I've never seen so much leather in the stands as I did on Saturday night.

I saw so many leather chaps & biker chicks (not the hot ones either...the kind that could beat me up and). There were numerous women supportn' the dike spike...women that had hair much shorter than me. I saw a few dudes with pony tails that were a few feet long. It was insane.

I know I posted a new poll recently...I encourage you to vote...and be sure to check back here on Tuesday for a special blog where I'll be sharing this area with a guest blogger. Together we will tackle the topic of "Flirting: is it okay if it gets you a bigger tip?" This has been a topic that has been on my mind for awhile and with the upcoming away series for the Cards, I want to still give you something to read and ponder.

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
130 Bottles of Water
213 Bags of Peanuts
3139 Bottles of Beer

Day 48 - Randomocity

Take a look at this photo.



Do you see why I took a quick photo with my phone? Take a second look at it. Yeah, that guy in the center of the photo has his laptop at the game. This was about 5 minutes before the game started. He was working away on it and every time I walked by this section throughout the game he was still on his laptop.

Just one of the many random things that took place at last night's game (Monday 8/10).

So I didn't blog at all last week...sorry...there is something about taking a break from this that feels good while I'm not working at the stadium.

The way this night went, I'm not going to waste any time and get right to the stories.

"What Not To Wear" - Sometimes I wonder what goes through people's minds when they are getting dressed before a baseball game. Is there even anything going on in their head? Too many girls wearing too little clothing... Usually I don't comment about this, but there were these two girls who must have thought it was a good idea to wear see-through tank-tops, shorts that were so short that the pockets stuck out past the shorts and knee-high socks...now most guys would like to see that on a girl or their wife...however, these girls weren't attractive by a long shot, it was just flat out disgusting... People, we are facing an epidemic...too many girls think it's a great idea to wear clothes 13-sizes too small! Stop the madness!

"Obama Happens" - During the 7th inning, I had a guy ask for 2 bottles of water. I looked in my tub to only see the one bottle and I didn't see another beer man in sight to possibly get this man both of the bottles of water he requested. So I let him know that I only had one bottle left, but could go find someone that had more. He looked at me and said, "no, that's okay. we'll take the one bottle." I apologized to him that I didn't have another bottle of water for him. He looked back at me and said, "well, Obama happens." I don't really know what he meant...I have interpreted it as him saying Obama (beerman) says he has things (water bottles) people (fans in the stands) want...but only gives half. I dunno...what do you think he meant by that statement?

Knee Pads - On my way downstairs to clock out, I was walking through the crowds of people when a guy yelled over to me. I looked his direction and he was just looking down at my knee pads. (I usually wear knee pads because we have to take a knee when selling during game play and concrete hurts the knees...after i'm done working, i usually pull the knee pads down and they rest around my ankles till I get home.) He said, "hey, are those knee pads?" I said, "yeah." He looked at me with the most serious face and said, "give me one of those knee pads. I need one of those." I just shook my head telling him i needed them for work and kept on walking. I think he might have had a few too many. I have been asked for many things while working at the stadium, but my knee pad is a first.

Hot & Humid - I have worked during several near 100 degree games...but tonight's humidity might have been the worst yet. The 83 degree air felt warm, but that humidity is what destroyed me and the other beer men. One veteran beer man from my commissary went home because he got sick from the heat. There were a few times I felt really dizzy walking down the steps of a section. I would take a quick break and drink some water before going down every few sections.

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
110 Bottles of Water
198 Bags of Peanuts
2823 Bottles of Beer

Day 44 - "ID please"...."you're a hard ass!"

I really don't know what I could say that could even compare to the game that took place last night.

I am still mad at myself for leaving the stadium last night. By the time I got through checking out and clocked out, it was the middle of the 9th inning. I decided that I would get to my car in time to beat the traffic since I knew I had a busy day ahead of me. As I was walking across the parking lot next to the stadium, I hear the roar of the crowd as the Cardinals got a runner on second and had the game winning run at the plate.

I walked past Mike Shannon's and stopped to look up at one of the screens that the game was projected onto. The "bouncer" standing there told me to come on in and I could watch if I wanted to from inside...I was rather shocked I wasn't carded...but maybe I'm just used to being the "hard ass" (yes, I was called that last night) that I am carding people in the stadium.

I watched the Cards tie up the game and I decide to head on home...I couldn't go back into the stadium anyways or I would have gone back in...and I personally didn't care to just stand around at Shannon's in my sweat-soaked uniform.

It was weird. I was sitting at home watching the game I was just working at. Then I got pissed. I realized my phone just died, so I went to grab the charger from my room and when I came back and looked at the tv, the game was over. Albert's walk-off hit was amazing...seen through replays...oh well...I have a hunch I'll see him hit many homeruns at a home game this season...

Anyways...last night was pretty amazing...not just the game, but in sales. I did pretty well! I decided that I would stop selling Cracker Jacks and sell bottled water in its place since I'd make more commission off of bottled water. Not to mention, cracker jack sales haven't been the best for me lately...

Stories and such from last night's game -

-I was called a "hard ass". I had a group of 4 ask for 4 beers. The guy on the end asked for them. I only got a quick glance at him and the guy next to him and the girl in the 4th seat down, but not the 3rd person. Since they looked like they were in their late 20's, I still carded them. (Reminder: we are to ID anyone who appears to be under 31 1/2) So the guy asked if I needed all 4 of them and I said yes. Well that 3rd person I didn't get a look at, looked like it was this dude's mom. He showed me his ID and he said he was 33 and his wife was older than him. So he showed me his wife's ID and she was older than him...she was in her late 40's...nearly a 15 year age difference....Anyways the girl at the end who I did see before wasn't too happy either...she asked me if I really needed to see her ID because she was going to have trouble getting it out of her wallet with a sprained wrist...she then lifted her wrist up to show the brace she had on. I asked if one of the guys could please help her and they finally got it. She was upset to the point where she wasn't even wanting the beer and called me a hard ass for carding them when they were clearly old enough...I gave them their 4 beers and collected their money...

My job as a beer man...(my only job and only source of income)...is too important to me to keep than to get fired for not carding someone and possibly getting caught selling to a minor! It seems to be that about every night, I have just one or two groups who get all pissed off about me carding them. Most people already have their ID ready for me to check. What's the big deal? If someone has gray hair and is obviously in their 80's, no, I won't card them...9 times out of 10, people (ladies) appreciate being carded.

-I sold an entire case of beer by only walking down one row of steps into one section...awesomeness! I nearly sold another full case during the bottom of the 7th inning in a different section!

-During the play where Manny caught that ball that cause a stir in the crowd, personally, it looked like it was a homerun where Manny put a little hollywood into it to get it called fan interference...I don't know why all of the fans thought that the beer man would know everything about that play that just happened, but I was bombarded with questions from people asking me what happened and why they called back that homerun...I just replied back that it'd be on Sports Center or Baseball Tonight later tonight...and it was.

Overall, I think I did pretty well in sales compared to other beer men...I sold right at 3 1/2 cases and I was shocked to hear how some of the guys didn't even get past their 2nd case...

I've come to learn that as a beer man, it's not just about making 'regular' customers through a game, but also being in the right spot at the right time....basically having ice cold beer when everyone around you is thirsty. ...mmmmm...that just made me thirsty...

Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
86 Bottles of Water
176 Bags of Peanuts
2511 Bottles of Beer

Day 43 - Rain, Rain, Go Away

I wanted to make sure tonight was well worth showing up for work. I had decided to play the responsible card and not go with friends to 6-Flags today and actually go to work...since the stadium job is currently my only source of income. So I told myself that I wanted to be sure tonight was well worth showing up for.

Then the rain came...and never left...well, not until around 8 did it clear up, only to start to sprinkle an hour later for most of the remainder of the game.

With an hour and 35 minute rain delay, we had to stop selling beer at 10. This didn't make many people happy...which I'll get to in a bit.

I had only sold 4 beers before the game started....4! oh, well that's not bad right? well, when I was working for a solid hour and 35 minutes before the game started...yeah...that's bad. You'd think people would just drink away during a rain delay...not tonight...everyone was off to a slow start. I was wondering if being responsible was a mistake for the day and 6-Flags would have been the best option....Finally people started drinking as soon as the first pitch was thrown. It was like a switch that was turned on in them. Baseball game started = time to drink brewskies.

The rain delay caused for plenty of people to crowd the Redbird Club. They were craving for this game to start...and as soon as the teams took the field, the Redbird club looked like a ghost town.

Stories...oh the stories:

-Manny was once again booed. When his name was announced, as he came to the plate, even as he fielded a ball hit into right field...no love for Manny. This actually kind of saddened me. Not that I'm a Manny fan, but for the little kids that showed up that were Manny fans. I saw numerous kids who were decked out in their Manny attire and were there to see their hero play ball. To bad their hero cheated...and most of them (the small children in Manny attire) don't understand that yet...and all they knew was that their hero wasn't welcome in Busch Stadium.

-After the game had started, I started walking the steps through the sections. I was walking down the steps of one section and before I even took the first step, I heard someone next to me ask for a Bud Light. I turn to my right and there is sitting a young guy on the end of the row and with him were two young girls next to him and a guy who might have been 21 next to the girls. I turn around and ask for his ID. He looked like he was already having a rough life and me asking for his ID is what sent him over the edge. He started to cuss and complain about me carding him. He never said it to my face, but as he was digging through his wallet, he would say how it was bullsh*t that I was carding him and how it was going to be f*cking ridiculous to be carded every time he wanted a beer. I read the expressions on the girls' face sitting next to him and they seemed to already be irritated by their friend's attitude. He hands me his ID, and the guy just turned 21 a few months ago. I guess when you turn 21, everyone simply knows you're 21 and you shouldn't have to be carded ever again....FALSE! I handed him his ID back and started to get his beer for him and told him it would be $7.75. He then fumbled through his wallet and started cussing some more about being carded.

At this point, I was already pissed at this kid and now he was sending me over the edge. I had already planned out in my head how I was going to be sure I spread the word to other beer men to keep their eye out for this kid and card him every damn time...or simply cut him off, since we do reserve the right to refuse a sale to anyone.

Anyways...back to this dumb ass sitting here fumbling with his dollar bills. He had to ask the girl next to him for a dollar in quarters cause he only had $6.75 on him. She fished out quarters for him...clearly he wasn't a big tipper...and I didn't expect it from the moment I saw him. He took the beer and handed it down to his friend sitting a few seats down from him. I said, "wait, I didn't know it was for him, I need to see an ID first." The kid buying the beer started to cuss some more about beer men ID'ing him and his friends. The guy who he bought the beer for said, "dude, chill, he is just doing his job." That's when this kid looked up at me as I was getting the other guy's ID and said, "wait, honestly, who do you think looks older?" I looked at his friend who had a much older look about himself and a half-beard growing...and then I looked back at the punk who had the baby-face going for him...and I said, "your friend does." That just pissed him off more...His friend was older. He was 22. So I gave him the beer and his buddy was still pissed and cussing and moaning about me ID'ing him. I just looked at him and told him, "I'm just doing my job. We ID everyone who appears to be 31 1/2 and under. You won't be able to go anywhere else in this stadium and not get ID'd." I then told him thank you for the sale and walked away.

As I made my way back up to the top of the steps of that section a few minutes later, he just glared at me the whole time I walked past him. He looked like he was having fun...like as if he thought he was amazing and had a much older look/appearance about himself...I would love to have that moment relived tonight, because I would have been a much more of a smart ass back to this guy. As the night progressed, I passed by him 2 more times going into that section and every time I would walk up the steps, I'd glance over that way to see if anyone wanted a beer and he'd be there glaring right back at me as if I just ruined his life forever.

-At 9:45, I started to announce 'last call'. Several people didn't like this. Since the game was still in the middle of the 5th, most people were expecting beer sales to continue through to the bottom of the 7th. I had one guy look very confused and almost sad as if he was going to cry and asked why we were ending so early. I explained how we are only allowed to sell till 10 because of the liquor license at Busch Stadium. I won't lie, the guy looked like he was ready to cry. Another group of guys we wanting to know what happened if there was another rain delay and the game lasted till 1 or 2 a.m. I told them that no matter what, we were done at 10. These guys weren't happy. They wanted to know who made those rules and why would we stop selling to beer-thirsty people? I explained it to them, but I think they had already drank a few too many to comprehend anything that was going on.


Totals thus far:
73 Bags of Cracker Jacks
80 Bottles of Water
171 Bags of Peanuts
2427 Bottles of Beer

Day 41 - 42 - Hit the Ground Running

It's been awhile since my last post. It has felt good to take a short break after the All-Star festivities. I did work the Friday night game following the All-Star Game against Arizona...It was decent. Honestly, not that many stories from it.

Several people would ask if I was there during the All-Star Game and wanted to know what that was like. I'll be honest, it still hasn't fully hit me that I was there.

I then took that Saturday game off and I went to the game on Sunday with my smokn' hot girlfriend. 3rd row up from center field in the bleachers...not a single hit out to us the whole game. We won though.

And now after having over a full week away from the stadium, I hit the ground running last night. A sold-out crowd in attendance to welcome in the new Cardinal's we had gained over this past weeks road trip.


Highlights/stories from working last night:

-Manny got booed and it was delicious!

-Holliday received a standing ovation from the his new hometown fans. Personally, I think Lugo should have gotten a standing-o as well, I mean, both guys are on fire!

-I had a really cool group of older guys who were Dodgers fans who kept buying from me all night and told me to come back tomorrow night cause they'd be there and would buy from me again.

-I witnessed an older guy (Cards fan)...I mean he had to be in his late 70's...maybe even 80's and he was standing up yelling and cussing at Manny and the Dodgers for keeping Manny. It was a sight to see...it was simply hilarious to hear an old man cuss.

-I had a fan who kept asking me for Grey Goose. I told him I only had Bud, Bud Light and Select Beer, he would simply respond in a goose-ish yell "Grey Goose". He had a good laugh and every time I walked by him, he'd yell, 'Grey Goose'.

-I think someone crapped their pants in section 251. I didn't even bother going down the steps into that section one time because the smell was so awful and so strong. People were complaining to the ushers and I think someone set off a stink-bomb...

Overall, a great night! Thanks to the bottom of the 7th, and the Dodgers' pitching changes, I was able to sell nearly a whole extra case of beer. I did just as good in sales as I did during the All-Star Game...If I keep this up all week...I could get away with only working at the stadium for the next month...

Games every night for the rest of the week...hopefully lots of stories to share!

Totals thus far:
72 Bags of Cracker Jacks
80 Bottles of Water
165 Bags of Peanuts
2381 Bottles of Beer

Day 29 - "we accept tips here"

I have one crazy story for you that happened to me before I even made it into the stadium on Saturday night.

I went to go park in the usual parking garage on 7th and Pine. It's only $4 when only a baseball game is going on and it is $5 if there is something else going on downtown. I don't mind paying $4 and walking a few blocks to the stadium instead of being closer and paying $10...that parking money adds up quickly when you're at nearly every home game!

So I enter into the parking garage and there are usually two ladies working in there to collect money. One is tall and skinny and the other shorter and round. The taller one is very pleasant whenever she collects my money and always says hi and actually engages in the 20-30 seconds I'm sitting there before entering into the garage.

The shorter one is very rude whenever she collects money from me. She usually has a blue-tooth headset on and carries on a conversation with someone on the phone and hardly ever says anything to me. Occasionally she complaining to me that I purposely drove into the lane that she wasn't in and how I made her get up to walk over to give me my parking pass.

Well this afternoon I pull into the garage. I see the shorter one walk over towards my car and she takes my money, hands me my parking pass and then she says something to me that really just was a surprise. She said, "you know we accept tips here."

ACCEPT TIPS!?!?!

I just looked at her with a blank look on my face and said, "ok."

She looked back at me with a pissed off look as if she would find me later in a dark alley...

I just looked back with that blank look on my face showing that I wasn't going to tip her and then I into the garage. I thought to myself, 'you sit on your butt and collect money and push a button to allow people to enter the garage, why should I be tipping you?!?!?!?!?'

You tip valet drivers.
You tip waiters/waitresses.
You tip delivery drivers.
You tip beer men.
Last time I checked, I've never heard of tipping a parking garage attendant who sits on their butt, collects money and then pushes a button!?!?!?!

I was dumbfounded. I still am actually. I'm rather still pissed that she would say that to me. Does she do anything to help me in any way to where I should be tipping her?!?!?!

NO!

I couldn't believe it! I shared the story with the other beer men in the commissary and they used some choice words I won't repeat about what I should have told the parking garage attendant when she told me that. They hadn't ever heard about tipping a garage attendant, but then again, us beer men aren't the classiest people on this earth either...but we have a sense of tipping. Anyone who has ever waited tables, been a delivery driver or has done any kind of 'service' jobs has a better understanding of when and how much you should tip...for the most part.

I've been parking in that same garage for any home cardinals game last season and have been parking there for nearly every single home game this season and have never EVER been asked/informed to tip.

Am I in the wrong? Should I tip a lady who already is collecting money for me to park my car in a garage and pushes a button to allow me to enter into that garage????

Oh yeah...as for the game, I sold a solid 3 cases of beer.

Had an overall good day. Too bad the Cardinals didn't. They lost to the Rockies. Last time i checked, the Rockies are in LAST PLACE of their division!

One quick story from while I was working:

I understand that I don't look anything like my age. I've hardly ever had any doubts when I card people that they are actually 21. I have had a few people who did surprise me and were over 21. Well on Saturday, I was at the bottom steps of a section when I noticed a guy (who looked like he was maybe 15) holding a beer in one hand and was staring at me the whole time I was in that section. When I caught him looking over at me, he quickly looked away. When I noticed him, I thought that he was incredibly way too young to be drinking and he was probably worried about being caught by a worker that he actually had a beer. I kept catching him looking back down at me and then as I was walking up the steps, I noticed he was on his second beer, since his current beer cup was in his first one. I informed the usher for that section that he looked very suspicious and she said that they already had others say the same thing and they have checked his ID and he was 21.

Sometimes I get "card" happy and just say "I.D. Please." without even thinking about it and get several people who are well over 21 (like in their late 40's) a bit thrown off about it.

I have had a few times when I couldn't sell beer to people because they didn't have their I.D. on them. They looked like they were in their mid-20's, but once I say, "I.D. Please" and they don't have it, I can't sell them beer.

Oh yeah, I also took Sunday and Monday off. Sunday, because I wanted to have a day off to relax. And Monday, cause it's a day game and I start working as a contractor at Wachovia. Check back this week as I blog about some interesting stories I have while being an STL beer man.

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
56 Bags of Cracker Jacks
118 Bags of Peanuts
1618 Bottles of Beer

Day 28 - Crazy Cougars and Foul Balls

Friday night at Busch Stadium...usually it's a sold out crowd and the stadium gets packed early in the evening...usually...

It was 6:30 and it looked like the stadium was as empty as a Monday night game would be...hardly anyone was there yet!

I was able to at least make a sale before the game started...which was a vast improvement from the rest of this week.

All I have to say is thank God for that long 7th inning, even if the Rockies scored 9 in the top of the 7th...it was those 3 pitching changes made by the Cards that extended that 'last call'...I was able to sell a case and a half during the 7th inning...which seemed to last nearly an hour!

Stories:

I had went to use the restroom before I took out my tub of beer and as I was standing the sink washing my hands...I noticed several other guys had walked in. Then I glanced up in the mirror and something very odd caught my attention. I saw a much older gentlemen walk up to a urinal and start to pull one leg of his shorts up...he had it hiked up to where I'm pretty sure he didn't bother unbuttoning his shorts to go.

******************************

I walked down towards the bottom of a section and was yelling out my beer call when I had noticed two ladies in her mid-40's staring right at my tub of beer. I thought, this should be an easy sell...if they are eyeballing that tub of beer, they are already wanting one... I asked one of them if she wanted one and I had noticed her and the lady sitting next to her were talking about me...they kept whispering back and forth and pointing down at me. She chuckled and asked me if I was even old enough to be selling beer. I did the routine of asking her how old she thought I was. Her friend next to her yelled "18" right away without hesitating. The lady I asked the question to responded back with a hesitant "21...22?" I replied that I was 26. They both laughed and one of them said, "The older we get, the younger you look." Then the one next to her said, "And the more we drink, the better you look."

I'm not even making this up...it caught me off guard because I was thinking, hey, I wanted to use that as a beer call at one point...but wait...did she just say I didn't look good now? What the hell??!?! So then as they were laughing one of them said, 'come back later on'...and as I was walking away she said, 'wow, i think he's just trying to get me drunk...well, i'll let him'.

******************************

While I was kneeling at the end of a section yelling out my beer call, I noticed an older gentleman was sitting on the end of a row and he had a glove on one hand and a beer in the other. He seriously looked like he was originally casted for for a role in one of the Grumpy Old Men movies. While I was there, a foul ball came back over the net and landed a few sections over and nearly hit a beer man. The older gentleman looked at me and asked if I had ever had any close calls with a foul ball coming back and hitting me. I told him how I've had a few close calls where the ball hit 3 or 4 seats away from where I was selling beer. He told me not to worry because I hadn't had him around when foul balls were hit towards me and that he would be sure to catch them...

******************************

After I had checked out for the night, I was standing in the commissary talking to a few guys and David (a beer man) asked me how I did. I responded that I made it 9 into my 4th case. He looked over at another beer man who he usually goes down to the lower sections and sells with and told him, 'Josh did better than we did tonight.' The other beer man looked back and said, 'No, cause I did 4 cases and he was just getting into his 4th.' David looked back at me and said, 'Well he did better than me. So you feel like you're starting to get the hang of this then?' I replied, 'Yeah, this week hasn't been the best, but yeah, I'm getting the hang of it.' One of the other beer men said, "well hell, I wish you weren't."

******************************

Another game tonight...hopefully more beer thirsty people will show up tonight...

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
46 Bags of Cracker Jacks
110 Bags of Peanuts
1546 Bottles of Beer

Never shake a baby...shake a beer instead.

Do I have your attention?

Great!

Some of this may intrigue you, some of it may bore you...either way, you've already read this far and by now nearly 77.5% of you have closed out of this blog.

For the most part, I'm sure you'll ignore this entry and visit again when I have stories from an actual game...and I'm okay with that.

In this entry I want to share with you some interesting statistics.

What if I told you that as of 12:00a.m. on Friday, May 29th, ever since April 6th, I could tell you that www.stlbeerman has had...

- 824 visits out of 287 unique visitors
- 1310 pageviews
- 61.17% (504)of those visits were from people who have Cable internet
- 0.97% (8) of those visits were from people who are crawling along on dialup internet
- we've gone INTERNATIONAL! (visits from Canada, Mexico, Sweden and the U.S. of A.)
- visitors from 32 of the 50 states in America (i'd personally love to see all 50 states represented)
- 7% of you clicked on the link in my twitter status. 30% of you clicked the link in my facebook status. And 52% of you know how to type in "www.stlbeerman.com" into your browser or have it bookmarked
- 24% of you have been loyal followers and have visited here more than 10 times
- 14% (105) of the visits have come from either an iPhone or an iPod

Now I've taken into account that 77% of the visits to stlbeerman.com have exited the site under 10 seconds, and this may include bots who search sites for information...or people who didn't get to realize how sweet of a blog this truly is...i'll go with more bots than people though...I've also been able to extract my visits to my own blog so that the stats are not skewed in any way.

Here's images of maps directly from Google Analytics:





By now, at least 20% of you have read through this much of this blog entry.

I'm able to do find out all of these things through Google Analytics.

I'm sharing this with you because of several reasons...

1. I'm a web designer and following these statistics is important in how marketing is done with sites.
2. I care about the people who read this blog...and i'm curious as to see who (not literally who, but where the people are located) is reading this blog. (but then again, if I only know one person from a certain city/country (mexico/canada I only know 2 people from each country) and I get a dot showing someone accesses this blog from that city...it warms my heart to know you've read).
3. I'm a dork.
4. I actually was wondering if anyone read this blog...because there hasn't been a consistently high amount of comments on my entries (which I'm not asking you to comment, it wouldn't bother me at all if you never commented, but only read the entries).
5. I was very curious from the marketing side of things...does word of mouth work best or facebook/twitter status'...

While I was at a wedding this past weekend, I was surprised by the number of people who told me they actually read this as well as the number of people who had no clue that I was a beer man...I mean, come on...people know all kinds of crap/gossip from everyone's facebook/twitter status, but you're telling me you haven't noticed a consistent status that links you to a site with the word "beer" in it!?!?!

As I digress...I want to let you know that I appreciate you reading this blog and that as long as the statistics are consistent, I'm saying this to only 14% of you...but I still appreciate the 86% of you who are speed readers!

So remember...never shake a baby...shake a beer instead.

Day 20 - "A Typical Sunday"

Day 20

Today was a really slow day. I don't know what else to really say about it...

...ok, so yes I do...

I sold my first case of beer before the first inning was over...I knew it was a Sunday, but I had some high-hopes for today...it was a feeling of just wanting to do well and sell as much as possible...then my balloon of high-hopes was popped after that first inning was over.

I only sold 8 beers into that second case between the start of the 2nd inning and the bottom of the 7th. I sold more bags of Cracker Jacks in those remaining 6 innings than I did beers.

Now for the stories...

I made my way down to the bottom of a section in the 3rd inning and saw a group of girls drinking beer and asked if they needed another one yet. They said not yet, but to come back soon. Then one of the ladies in the row behind them asked a question, but I couldn't quite hear here nor did I realize she was talking to me since she had on sun glasses and looked like she was looking past me. I just had this dumbfounded look on my face because I was confused and then all of the girls in this group laughed at me...I was confused. I just laughed with them and was asked her to repeat herself. She was asking me if I could go get her a mixed drink... I told her that I was only selling beer today. She asked if I was possibly carrying around a mini-bar in my Cracker Jack bag...I played along with it and got a laugh...she was already drunk and didn't need another mixed drink or any drink at all. I was on my way back to the group of girls in the row below when I noted they had left...they never came back the rest of the game.

Usually throughout the game if a beer man sees a fellow beer man, we'll stop and say hi and ask how we're doing. One fellow beer man of Commissary 240, Donald, stopped for a minute at the top of a section and we talked for a minute. He was doing good to finish off his first case half way through the game. He just shook his head and said, "today is just a typical Sunday. No one buys beer on Sunday afternoon games." It didn't help that people sitting in the shade were cold. Many of them had blankets or sweatshirts. I had to take a double-take when I walked up one section because I almost swore I saw a lady wearing a snuggie...she was not...it was just a blanket...guess her arms will get cold if she needs to reach for something and she won't look like a wizard...

I think despite the fact that the game was a crappy performance by the Cardinals and beer sales were slower than the norm...the worst part of the day was the drive home. There was some huge festival taking place in Keiner Plaza. It just so happened that people were leaving it the same time the game was getting over. Since the game was sucking, tons of people left early which caused a larger than normal traffic jam...I sat in traffic for about an hour before I got onto the interstate downtown...about 8 blocks took an hour...it doesn't help that everyone else thinks they are amazing drivers when in reality they worsened the jam with their stupidity.

Friday's rain-out game rescheduled for tomorrow night...

Day 14 -17 - Is there something wrong?

Day 14 (May 4th)

Sometimes I get some of the weirdest looks from people sitting in the stands. It's a look of disgust sometimes...and sometimes it's a look as if I just landed in STL from another planet and have told them that I will destroy them and everyone around them.

Monday night, I was getting more looks than any other game I've worked. I started to wonder if I had something on my face, if my shirt was on inside-out, or was there snot hanging from my nose?...

I just looked back and heckle out my beer call while the monologue is going through my head (yes, just like J.D. does on Scrubs, I narrate most of my life in my head). I think to myself, "what are you looking at? who are you to be eye-balln' me and my tub of beer? NO BEER FOR YOU! (said in my best soup-nazi monologue voice)".

There are some people that stare at me as if I'm causing a problem...there have been a few times that I get someone staring at me and then back to my tub of beer and they look like their mouths are watering and they just gaze at the beer as if it's a tub of millions of dollars...I sometimes wonder if they are recovering alcoholics and if they are tempted to relapse and buy a cold one from me...this has been one of the few times that I wrestle with my job.

I've caught girls checking me out before...which makes it awkward for them and hilarious for me.

I get all kinds of looks...

Usually the moms that is at the stadium with her husband and kids are the ones to look at me with a death stare...it sounds like they are yelling at me..."how dare you bring that alcohol around my babies"...

I often times get some funny looks from kids.

Kids also say the darnedest things...

Monday night I was walking down some steps into a section and a little guy about 4 years old looked up at me and said something...I have trouble understanding kids sometimes and it sounded like he was asking for ice cream...I told him I didn't have ice cream. He mumbled it back to me and pointed to my tub. I then realized he was asking for an ice cold beer...he had mimicked my beer call and was saying 'ice cold beer'. I chuckled and told him that he needed to come back in about 18 years and he can buy one then...

While I was in another section, 2 little guys that were probably 6 or 7 would wave at me every time I would yell my beer call. It kept confusing me cause I've got that trained eye to watch for that and every time it was throwing me off...I waved back and then people around those kids were confused...oh sometimes it's a confusing job all around...


Day 15 (May 5th) Cinco de Mayo

I honestly thought that I would sell more beer on Cinco de Mayo...wrong.

Everyone was having trouble selling...which makes me feel good knowing its not something I'm doing wrong.

I don't have a single clever story to tell from Tuesday night other than that I carded a woman who really shouldn't have been carded...

She definitely looked in her early 20's from sitting as far away as she was. When she asked for a beer, I couldn't tell if it was for her or for the girls sitting next to her, and after asking if it was for her, she said yes, so I went ahead and asked for an ID...her jaw dropped, she was so happy, i was so scared...she got up and as she walked towards me, you could tell that she was every bit of in her late 40's... Sure enough, she was 46 and she was so happy to be carded...i was scared to death of this lady and sold her a beer and got out of there...she was creepy up close...I was happy to see her go back to her seat when she looked like an early 20-year old.


Day 16 & 17 Sitting the bench.

I took Wednesday and today off. I just started to work as a temp again back at the Federal Reserve Bank and was wanting a break from it all..going from 8-5 and then 5-10 is exhausting...not to mention, Monday and Tuesday were very slow nights for beer men and they already had projected the attendance numbers to be lower on Wednesday and today...and today was also a day game. I decided that this guy needed to ride the bench for a few games because the rest of this month is going to be crazy busy with another full week of home games (cards/cubs series in there!), wedding on a weekend, few days off and then a stretch of 8-home games in a row.


Total sales thus far:
4 Bags of Cracker Jacks
33 Bottles of Water
70 Bags of Peanuts
892 Bottles of Beer

*I forgot to add sales into my count when I blogged about the Cards/Cubs, so that's why my sales jumped up.