Day 35 - Monday, it's Sunday's ugly half-brother.

After enjoying a beautiful Sunday afternoon off...time to get back to the grind.

Usually a beer man won't make many sales on Sunday's. Not because of the whole 'religious' aspect of it (being a Sunday means people don't drink? ha!), but because people have to go to work the next day. And no, Christians don't drink...especially on Sunday's...right? I'll let you believe what you want, but I have no shame in tipping back a tall cold one on a Sunday afternoon...but nonetheless, sales are really awful on Sundays...thus the reason why I took the day off!

*******************************

Tonight just felt like a great night for baseball! Much cooler weather and a slight breeze made it near perfect conditions.

Tonight's sales weren't too bad...for me. While talking in the commissary at the end of the night, some of the guys were talking about how bad they had done that night and how Monday night is rough to sell beer. Even with a sold-out crowd in attendance, people just weren't buying much beer. One of the beer man said it best, "Monday, it's Sunday's ugly half-brother."

I personally thought Monday wasn't that bad. I mean, I think I enjoyed it a lot more with the cooler weather. Don't get me wrong, I still sweat like a pregnant nun in church, but it wasn't a nasty sweat.

Stories from tonight:

I was walking down the steps into a section and yelling out my beer call when a guy in the top row was yelling back my beer call to the entire section. I looked back to see some guy with a oversized cowboy hat...only way I could describe it was that he was mocking me. I got back up to the top of the section and he asked me if he got his free beer and commission for helping me make all of those sales in that section. I told him that we were always hiring and if he wanted another beer. His buddies next to him did. They had been smartn' off to me the whole time I was talkn' to them, so I flexed the muscle of the beer man and asked for their ID. The guy with the hat told his buddies he taught me how to yell, but he didn't teach me to check ID's. Come to find out, they were in the military, all having military ID's. That's all that really happened...so I guess that story had a lame ending...

While selling beer in one section, I noticed a bunch of teenage boys sitting up out of their seats and looking down a few rows in front of them. I glanced down to see what could have been drawing these delinquents' attention away from the game. It was a group of girls, probably in their late teens-maybe 20 or 21. I was tempted to go let them know that the guys a few rows behind them needed their attention and then I would simply leave the area...but I had other priorities...like sell beer.

I encountered something odd in the stairwell on my way down to Sports Services' lobby located in the basement. A full team of firemen were in full gear walking down the steps right behind me in the stairwell. I was really thrown off when I noticed about a half dozen cops right behind them. They were carrying long odd shaped metal pieces over their shoulders. Not a single piece of metal was the same. Some of it was wrapped in clothe. I noticed the firetruck with it's lights on outside the stadium as I left. I still dunno what happened.

Not that crazy of a night...but then again it was a Monday...and if Monday is Sunday's ugly half-brother, I'd hate to see Sunday's sister! But then again, Monday wasn't nearly as ugly as the way the Cardinals played tonight. They got spanked by the Giants...10-0.

Totals thus far:
57 Bags of Cracker Jacks
80 Bottles of Water
141 Bags of Peanuts
1940 Bottles of Beer

Day 32, 33 & 34 - Hot, Hot as Hell

I got chills today.

In that 98 degree heat (before heat index) I was getting chills. It was in the bottom of the 3rd right after Pujols hit his 2nd 2-run hr of the day. The cheers of the crowd only got louder as the slugger when back to the dugout. Then when he finally came out for the curtain, the place erupted. That's when it set in. I was witnessing the greatest baseball player of our time play ball. I thought to myself how someday I hope to get to tell my kids about watching Pujols and witnessing the audacity that was Albert Pujols. Regardless if you are a Cardinals fan or not, we can all agree that Pujols is the greatest player of our time.

It's been far too long since my last posting. Lots has happened. In just the span of a week, we've lost some great ones...Ed McMahon, Farah Fawcett and the "king of pop" Michael Jackson. Honestly, I don't think Michael Jackson has died...he's just chilln' with 2 Pac...ok, or maybe he did pass away...but it's a good theory. In other news, Adam Lambert is gay, water is still wet, the sun is still hot and I'm still selling beer.

With the passing of MJ, I was honestly wondering how many of his songs we would hear played at the game on Friday night. Surprisingly enough, not as many as I thought. They played one of MJ's songs during the Kiss Cam...they also played one during the question of the day, which ironically enough was, "what was your favorite MJ song and dance move?". Personally, I think I would go with having a 3-way tie with, Beat It, Thriller and You Rock My World. Dance move: Moon-walk. (DUH!)

The past two days have been the hottest days of the year so far. With a heat index reaching up into 115 today, it'd be an understatement to mention that I sweat off nearly 10lbs each day. I actually felt very lightheaded at several times today. It was an exhaustion that I've never felt before. Most of it was from the effects of dehydration setting in. I couldn't drink enough water to keep up with the amount of sweat pouring out from my body. There were numerous times that sweat would run down into my eyes...not an enjoyable feeling.

I had numerous people today tell me that they didn't envy my job. I was asked over and over again if it was hot enough? I would think to myself, "nope, perfect weather for baseball...if we were playing in Hell!" I could hear numerous people complaining about how hot it was and then I'd walk down next to them and they'd notice the sweat running down my face and would quickly shut their mouth.

It was Christian Family Day at the ballpark. So most of the regular beer men didn't show up. Fine by me. The fewer the beer men, the more sales the rest of us can make. Most of the guys in the commissary were complaining about how all of the Christians at the game were only going to want water...Holy water. They were also saying how all of the Christians were complaining how it was going to be hot as hell today.

I still sold some beer today. I received a few dirty looks from parents who were clearly wanting to protect their children from the filth of the world, known as Bud, Bud Light and Bud Select.

Taking the day off tomorrow. Not wanting to wear myself out with the 4th of July coming up since we are in a 7-game home stand.

Look back for another update Monday night!

Totals thus far:
56 Bags of Cracker Jacks
80 Bottles of Water
136 Bags of Peanuts
1890 Bottles of Beer

Day 31 - A booming voice?

As I pulled into the parking garage today, she was standing there, and she looked pissed off more than ever...that's right folks, it was the lady who accepts tips.

I was ready to just snap on her for her stupid comment before...but luckily for her, she was exceptionally rude and didn't say a single word to me...in fact, she didn't even look at me! I called off the air strike and pulled the guns back and yelled out "hold your fire"...today was not her day to get an earful from me...

As I mentioned in my previous blog, the food vendors that were in Commissary 240 were causing plenty of chaos tonight. I've never seen so many kids...act...like...kids...they were fighting over who got to have a cotton-candy pole, who was going to sell peanuts since there were only a few peanut buttons and you can't sell an item without a button.

I decided to take matters into my own hands...because like I mentioned last night, I was not wanting to be thrown off my balance without a bag of nuts over my shoulder. So I went to another commissary and got a peanut button so I could at least have something over my shoulder to help me catch my balance. It might be more of a psychological thing, but I claim that even having two or three bags of peanuts in the bag, helps me catch my balance.

So I got to sell water, peanuts and beer.

I usually put my beer and water/soda on ice at least 30 minutes before going out into the stands....and with the heat index of 98...i decided to stay inside as long as possible while my beer is on ice.

While I was selling my first beers of the night, I noticed the coolness of my beer tub...I don't mean as in how it looked, but the temperature. It was like how you see steam rising up off of something...well it was so cold in my tub, when i lifted the lid from my beer, it was awesome!

I made a sale and typically after I finish a sale, I'll yell out my beer call from right there...the gentleman I just sold a beer to looks at me and says, "you have a very booming voice. impressive. do you practice that in front of the bathroom mirror?" I was shocked. The mute beer man finally got his voice back. I could tell I was projecting much better today. I assured him that I do not practice in front of the bathroom mirror...I practice in my car on my way to work....just kidding...or am I?

I didn't do that well tonight. No one did. The heat doesn't help either...I wouldn't have minded sweating off 5 pounds tonight if beer sales were better than what they were!

I had one guy ask me if I was sweating enough. I had sweat pouring down my face and dropping down onto the cardboard top of the case of beer in my beer tub. I wish they had air conditioned uniforms for us to wear!

Yeah for tomorrow's heat index of 105...wonder if I'll sweat off 5 more pounds?

Totals thus far:
49 Bottles of Water
56 Bags of Cracker Jacks
125 Bags of Peanuts
1717 Bottles of Beer

Day 30 - The Beer Man with no voice

I didn't encounter the lady who accepts tips in the parking garage today...I was rather bummed...because I wanted to leave her a tip...ha! ok, not really...

Tonight was the first time I've been back in over a week. I knew my body was going to pay for being so lazy in between games...As I type this, I can feel it in my arms and legs...they will hate me in the morning.

I go into commissary 240 and notice a bunch of high schoolers running around in vendor shirts...I thought to myself, "crap, the food vendors are back"

The food vendors are anyone who doesn't sell beer...either because they don't want to or aren't old enough...and yes, there are guys who are over 21 and choose not to sell beer. They also tend to get in the way of beer men and like to run their mouths a lot...(well, most of them). I found out that they brought in the food vendors after hiring a bunch of people to prepare for the All-Star festivities.

I thought to myself that if the food vendors are back in Commissary 240, then we won't have to sell 3 items during a game...(when the food vendors were removed from com.240, beer vendors had to sell 3 items instead of just 2) Nope. still had to sell 3 items. Luckily for me, there weren't enough buttons to go around for everyone and so I just sold beer and water.

Not having a bag of peanuts and cracker jacks over my shoulder really messed me up. I have been used to having it to help me keep my balance while going up and down steps...So there were a few times I thought I was gonna go face-first into the steps and the beer tub was gonna go for a ride...


As the game got started, the humidity was so high, I felt as if it was suffocating me. I was rolling in sweat before I even got out of the locker room and by the time I started to sell beer, sweat was rolling down my face.

I'm going to blame this on the humidity...or maybe it was because I had the feeling like I needed to burp, but couldn't all night (you know that feeling like you got a burp caught in your throat)...but I felt like I wasn't yelling very loud tonight. I just felt like every time I did my beer call, it wasn't projecting. Had the beer man lost his touch by being off for over a week? I just felt like a mute most of the time because even when the crowd was silent and my voice still didn't project.

Over and over again, I'd clear my throat and give out a holler. I would stop and drink some water and go back at it...no luck. I just decided that I'd do what I could do and try to do better tomorrow.

I honestly don't have any great stories besides that. I got to refuse selling beer to a girl cause she didn't have an ID...even though she just finished off a beer as she was trying to buy one from me. Then when I told her I couldn't sell her one, she was trying to get her friend to buy her one and I told her I couldn't do that either. She wasn't happy and I wasn't going to lose my job, so she just had to deal with it.

Tomorrow is supposed to be a high of 95...I might sweat off another 5 pounds tomorrow!

Totals thus far:
41 Bottles of Water
56 Bags of Cracker Jacks
118 Bags of Peanuts
1678 Bottles of Beer

Day 29 - "we accept tips here"

I have one crazy story for you that happened to me before I even made it into the stadium on Saturday night.

I went to go park in the usual parking garage on 7th and Pine. It's only $4 when only a baseball game is going on and it is $5 if there is something else going on downtown. I don't mind paying $4 and walking a few blocks to the stadium instead of being closer and paying $10...that parking money adds up quickly when you're at nearly every home game!

So I enter into the parking garage and there are usually two ladies working in there to collect money. One is tall and skinny and the other shorter and round. The taller one is very pleasant whenever she collects my money and always says hi and actually engages in the 20-30 seconds I'm sitting there before entering into the garage.

The shorter one is very rude whenever she collects money from me. She usually has a blue-tooth headset on and carries on a conversation with someone on the phone and hardly ever says anything to me. Occasionally she complaining to me that I purposely drove into the lane that she wasn't in and how I made her get up to walk over to give me my parking pass.

Well this afternoon I pull into the garage. I see the shorter one walk over towards my car and she takes my money, hands me my parking pass and then she says something to me that really just was a surprise. She said, "you know we accept tips here."

ACCEPT TIPS!?!?!

I just looked at her with a blank look on my face and said, "ok."

She looked back at me with a pissed off look as if she would find me later in a dark alley...

I just looked back with that blank look on my face showing that I wasn't going to tip her and then I into the garage. I thought to myself, 'you sit on your butt and collect money and push a button to allow people to enter the garage, why should I be tipping you?!?!?!?!?'

You tip valet drivers.
You tip waiters/waitresses.
You tip delivery drivers.
You tip beer men.
Last time I checked, I've never heard of tipping a parking garage attendant who sits on their butt, collects money and then pushes a button!?!?!?!

I was dumbfounded. I still am actually. I'm rather still pissed that she would say that to me. Does she do anything to help me in any way to where I should be tipping her?!?!?!

NO!

I couldn't believe it! I shared the story with the other beer men in the commissary and they used some choice words I won't repeat about what I should have told the parking garage attendant when she told me that. They hadn't ever heard about tipping a garage attendant, but then again, us beer men aren't the classiest people on this earth either...but we have a sense of tipping. Anyone who has ever waited tables, been a delivery driver or has done any kind of 'service' jobs has a better understanding of when and how much you should tip...for the most part.

I've been parking in that same garage for any home cardinals game last season and have been parking there for nearly every single home game this season and have never EVER been asked/informed to tip.

Am I in the wrong? Should I tip a lady who already is collecting money for me to park my car in a garage and pushes a button to allow me to enter into that garage????

Oh yeah...as for the game, I sold a solid 3 cases of beer.

Had an overall good day. Too bad the Cardinals didn't. They lost to the Rockies. Last time i checked, the Rockies are in LAST PLACE of their division!

One quick story from while I was working:

I understand that I don't look anything like my age. I've hardly ever had any doubts when I card people that they are actually 21. I have had a few people who did surprise me and were over 21. Well on Saturday, I was at the bottom steps of a section when I noticed a guy (who looked like he was maybe 15) holding a beer in one hand and was staring at me the whole time I was in that section. When I caught him looking over at me, he quickly looked away. When I noticed him, I thought that he was incredibly way too young to be drinking and he was probably worried about being caught by a worker that he actually had a beer. I kept catching him looking back down at me and then as I was walking up the steps, I noticed he was on his second beer, since his current beer cup was in his first one. I informed the usher for that section that he looked very suspicious and she said that they already had others say the same thing and they have checked his ID and he was 21.

Sometimes I get "card" happy and just say "I.D. Please." without even thinking about it and get several people who are well over 21 (like in their late 40's) a bit thrown off about it.

I have had a few times when I couldn't sell beer to people because they didn't have their I.D. on them. They looked like they were in their mid-20's, but once I say, "I.D. Please" and they don't have it, I can't sell them beer.

Oh yeah, I also took Sunday and Monday off. Sunday, because I wanted to have a day off to relax. And Monday, cause it's a day game and I start working as a contractor at Wachovia. Check back this week as I blog about some interesting stories I have while being an STL beer man.

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
56 Bags of Cracker Jacks
118 Bags of Peanuts
1618 Bottles of Beer

Day 28 - Crazy Cougars and Foul Balls

Friday night at Busch Stadium...usually it's a sold out crowd and the stadium gets packed early in the evening...usually...

It was 6:30 and it looked like the stadium was as empty as a Monday night game would be...hardly anyone was there yet!

I was able to at least make a sale before the game started...which was a vast improvement from the rest of this week.

All I have to say is thank God for that long 7th inning, even if the Rockies scored 9 in the top of the 7th...it was those 3 pitching changes made by the Cards that extended that 'last call'...I was able to sell a case and a half during the 7th inning...which seemed to last nearly an hour!

Stories:

I had went to use the restroom before I took out my tub of beer and as I was standing the sink washing my hands...I noticed several other guys had walked in. Then I glanced up in the mirror and something very odd caught my attention. I saw a much older gentlemen walk up to a urinal and start to pull one leg of his shorts up...he had it hiked up to where I'm pretty sure he didn't bother unbuttoning his shorts to go.

******************************

I walked down towards the bottom of a section and was yelling out my beer call when I had noticed two ladies in her mid-40's staring right at my tub of beer. I thought, this should be an easy sell...if they are eyeballing that tub of beer, they are already wanting one... I asked one of them if she wanted one and I had noticed her and the lady sitting next to her were talking about me...they kept whispering back and forth and pointing down at me. She chuckled and asked me if I was even old enough to be selling beer. I did the routine of asking her how old she thought I was. Her friend next to her yelled "18" right away without hesitating. The lady I asked the question to responded back with a hesitant "21...22?" I replied that I was 26. They both laughed and one of them said, "The older we get, the younger you look." Then the one next to her said, "And the more we drink, the better you look."

I'm not even making this up...it caught me off guard because I was thinking, hey, I wanted to use that as a beer call at one point...but wait...did she just say I didn't look good now? What the hell??!?! So then as they were laughing one of them said, 'come back later on'...and as I was walking away she said, 'wow, i think he's just trying to get me drunk...well, i'll let him'.

******************************

While I was kneeling at the end of a section yelling out my beer call, I noticed an older gentleman was sitting on the end of a row and he had a glove on one hand and a beer in the other. He seriously looked like he was originally casted for for a role in one of the Grumpy Old Men movies. While I was there, a foul ball came back over the net and landed a few sections over and nearly hit a beer man. The older gentleman looked at me and asked if I had ever had any close calls with a foul ball coming back and hitting me. I told him how I've had a few close calls where the ball hit 3 or 4 seats away from where I was selling beer. He told me not to worry because I hadn't had him around when foul balls were hit towards me and that he would be sure to catch them...

******************************

After I had checked out for the night, I was standing in the commissary talking to a few guys and David (a beer man) asked me how I did. I responded that I made it 9 into my 4th case. He looked over at another beer man who he usually goes down to the lower sections and sells with and told him, 'Josh did better than we did tonight.' The other beer man looked back and said, 'No, cause I did 4 cases and he was just getting into his 4th.' David looked back at me and said, 'Well he did better than me. So you feel like you're starting to get the hang of this then?' I replied, 'Yeah, this week hasn't been the best, but yeah, I'm getting the hang of it.' One of the other beer men said, "well hell, I wish you weren't."

******************************

Another game tonight...hopefully more beer thirsty people will show up tonight...

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
46 Bags of Cracker Jacks
110 Bags of Peanuts
1546 Bottles of Beer

Day 27 - I'm Ripped?

So I forgot to mention two very important stories from Wednesday night's game...

1) Usually Busch Stadium has a student choir or some group of children sing 'Take Me Out To The Ball Game' during the 7th inning stretch. As fans stood for the middle of the 7th, the announcer came on over the PA and announced that John Rich from Big & Rich would be singing 'Take Me Out To The Ball Game'. I was shocked for one...cause I may or may not have seen him while Nashville Star was on NBC...two I just couldn't believe that on a Wednesday night that's who they'd have come sing...I mean, I'd understand on a weekend, but really?...John Rich did an alright job...he tried going real high on the last part of the song and the mic's gain wasn't set right because it was really really distorted and just made for an awful finish.

2) At the end of the 6th inning, they were showing a lady on the screen who was celebrating her 100th birthday that day. I'll be honest, she didn't look 100...she looked about early 80's...but then again, how many people do I see that are 100? They asked her a few questions. One of questions was, "How many world series have you got to seen the Cubs win?" She quickly replied, "None in my lifetime!" You would have thought the Cards just won the WS the way that stadium roared with cheers! The whole stadium then sang "Happy Birthday" to her and she got a standing ovation after that! It was pretty cool to see.

Now as for tonight...

I was in a funk before I even entered the stadium...something was just bothering me and I could figure out what it was and I couldn't get rid of the feeling that I was going to have a bad night. Perhaps I was able to predict the future...because it was an awful night. Not just for me, but for all of the beer men.

Once again, a crappy night!

I only sold a case and a half of beer. Most guys didn't even finish two cases. I don't understand it. I was worried that it was me having the rough night and wasn't able to see anything but I felt much better knowing that the fans just weren't drinking tonight.

I didn't sell a single beer till the bottom of the 1st. I was so furious. The beer tub was getting really heaving, having carried it around for what felt like an eternity. Usually I don't carry a full tub of beer for very long, because people start to buy...ha!

I made more in tips than I made in commission!...which wasn't much!

Enough of that crap...how about a story from tonight:

It was the bottom of the 7th and I was yelling out for last calls. I had made my way down to the bottom of a section when I heard a girl say, "Hey, Josh". This always catches me off guard...I usually forget that people actually read my name on my name-tag and call me by name. So I look over towards where I heard the voice and I saw a girl sitting there with a beer in her hand. I thought she was going to ask for a beer. She said, "Hey, I bet you are just f'n ripped aren't ya?" I didn't know what to expect when she said my name, but I sure wasn't expecting that. I looked at her and she could tell I was caught off guard...I'm sure if I hadn't had the night going the way it was, I could have been a bit quicker with a witty comeback. She said, "I bet you are just mother f'n ripped from having to carry those tubs of beer around." I responded, "I'm in better shape than what I was when I first started this job." She said, "I've seen these guys carry these f'n tubs around and they've just got to get all f'n jacked from doing this all summer." And that was it. She just turned away and looked back towards the game.

**Note - I don't know if anyone has actually looked at me lately, but I'm not at all anything close to what would resemble "ripped" or "jacked". I never have been some huge built guy...I will say that it's a fact that the only time I truly worked out and lifted weights was while I wrestled in high school. During that time I did in fact have a ripped body...but after college and having a desk job for awhile...that ripped 6-pack became a bit protected, like with a soft-sided cooler. I have noticed that I can carry a full tub of beer without it ripping my shoulders out of socket the way it did during the first home series of the season. My goal is to be able to carry up to 2 cases of beer in my tub by the time the All-Star Game is here. That way I make fewer trips back to the commissary and can sell more beer in between trips.

So I'll take my protein shake made of the richest, darkest, thickest beers known to man, raise it high into the air and solute you, girl who had the thought that underneath these sweaty rags of a uniform was something worth drooling over.

I'm ready for Friday's and Saturday's games...I shouldn't have any problem selling 3 cases each night!

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
43 Bags of Cracker Jacks
107 Bags of Peanuts
1465 Bottles of Beer

Day 26 - Slow and steady doesn't make you money!

Last night was such a slow night at the stadium for...selling beer, people getting into the stadium, the Cardinals scoring runs...

Oh and and if you didn't see the pictures from the wreck that caused an hour and 45 minute delay in my commute to the stadium last night...here is a the aftermath of the charred overpass from the semi on fire.



Yeah...awesome.

So as for last night...

They always say "Slow and steady wins the race"...HA, not when selling beer at a stadium!

It was such a bad week for those newbies to start up. A few of them haven't showed back up since Monday night...I don't blame them...but I keep my eye on the prize of that Home Run Derby and All-Star game...and it's a job and a sweet paycheck for the few hours I work each night!

I don't know if it was because of the perfect (to me it was perfect) 60 degree weather or the fact that it was a wednesday night or just the fact that there didn't seem like anyone was at the game...but no one sold hardly any beer last night.

Beer men that usually sell nothing less than 4 cases had trouble selling 3 full cases!

As for stories from last night:

There was this girl who had just turned 21 about a month ago that was consistently buying beer from me through the night. At one point during the game she looked at me and said, "I bet you have beautiful calf muscles." She then looked over at her friend and said, "Yes, I bet these guys all have beautiful calves from walking these steps." It struck me as odd, cause she didn't say I did...and she didn't say I didn't...but she was taking a good guess and I won't deny that she's right...well, by the end of the summer she'll be dead on right!

As I made my way down to the bottom of a section, I did my beer call and a guy sitting on the end of a row looked over at me. As he noticed that no one was buying beer from me...he said, "It's this weather. It's just too cold." I replied, "It wouldn't stop me." I mean, it was only 60 degrees and who doesn't want their favorite food/beverages while attending a baseball game?!?!?! It's like a tradition. It's something you want to do every time you go because you don't get to go every day of the week!

Just a slow night. And a slow night doesn't produce many stories...but check back again late tonight/tomorrow morning for another update!

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
40 Bags of Cracker Jacks
105 Bags of Peanuts
1429 Bottles of Beer

Day 25 - One of those days...

I left to head to work at 5:10p.m. (central standard time zone, for my east coast friends)

I didn't clock-in until 6:45p.m. CST.

Traffic was not friendly today...Click here to see why.

5:22p.m. I thought I was making great timing and when I made it past 170 while on 70, I heard the traffic report that there was a truck on fire downtown on 70 eastbound...they advised everyone to not take 70 eastbound at all! Awesome! I decided that I would take the expressway and get downtown really quick...ha!

5:55p.m. Only 1 mile to go till the expressway...and I'm crawling there...I never went over 10mph driving there...

5:57p.m. I call Sports Services to let them know that I would not be there by the 6:15 check-in time cut-off but i was on my way...they told me I had till 6:30 to show up.

6:05p.m. I have made it to the exit for the expressway only to find out that the expressway was shutdown...the sign showing how long till you reach downtown read: I-64/I-55 50 min. 7 miles. 50 minutes to go 7 miles!?!?!? I decide to take the next exit (West Florissant Road) and find my way downtown through the north side of downtown STL...

6:15p.m. After going through a part of STL that I've never been through before, I make it to Washington Ave. (thank you iPhone!)

6:22p.m. I know there is no way I'm going to be able to make it to the park before 6:30 even by the time I get parked and walk to the stadium...I contemplated not going in and working on many other things at home...I call to let Sports Services know I wasn't going to make it and they told me they were allowing everyone to get there by 7:00pm because of the accident on I-70. Awesome!

6:45p.m. I clocked in and got prepared to sell beerverages.

Even the newbies were out of the commissary before I got up there to get my stuff. I quickly got everything and headed out towards my starting point when I felt like something wasn't right...was it the fact of being late? no, I didn't forget anything...I finally realized as I made my first sale that I hadn't pulled my knee pads up yet...I took a knee and the feeling of concrete on my knee sent pain through my leg...that sucked...I was so rushed to go out and sell beer that I forgot to pull my knee pad up.

I think everyone was thrown off by the accident since the majority of the staff were late as well as the fans...but oh the evening was just as eventful as my drive to work...

I don't know why, but I sweat more tonight than I did last night...and it was much cooler tonight than last night. I had to stop before going down each section to wipe my face off because the sweat was just running down my face and dripping off of me.

I witnessed 2 guys that looked rather shady get pulled from their seats to have their ID's verified. Someone must have reported that they had suspicious ID's.

I had a girl (probably mid-20's) who was wearing something that was...well, i'll just call it 'slut-tastic' get up out of her seat and walk over to me while I was selling a beer. She looked at me for a second...I asked if I could help her. She asked where she could go to smoke. I told her she had to exit the stadium and smoke outside near the designated gates. She had a look of despair on her face and asked me if there was anywhere I'd let her go to be able to smoke...I replied, "no, you have to go to the designated areas." She kind of did a little whimpering face and asked if I'd let her go smoke anywhere else... I thought to myself, this is ridonkulous! Slutty McSlut Slut wanted me to allow her to smoke in the Stadium. I told her she could go to one of the designated areas...she stomped off and went back to the group of guys she was with...as she walked away, some of the guys I just sold beer to were making comments about her...comments I won't repeat because of how low and degrading they were.

I was walking down the steps in a section and noticed a larger lady kick a foot up into the air...then her other leg kicked up into the air...this lady was spread-eagle in her seat and the guy in front of her was motioning as if he were...(parents, shield your childrens' eyes)...well, performing oral on her...I'm not joking...I had to stop where I was...I used my best judgment to decide that they were better off not being served anymore alcoholic beverages for the evening...the two had stopped their sex-ed demonstration by the time I had walked past their row...after I made it to the bottom of the steps, I turned around to heckle out my beer-call and I was just in shock...I was in shock by the number people who were laughing at this while most of them had children sitting near by and how many families with young children were sitting directly behind them...I could hear the lady talking about needing another beer...I quickly got out of that section and told an usher about everything and to keep an eye on them.

I was worried when I started the night off because I have a sun burn...I thought that carrying that bag of peanuts and cracker jacks might be difficult...I just now realized as I type this that it only peeled off one layer of my burnt shoulder.

As I was downstairs getting ready to turn in my apron and towels, I pulled out my slip of paper that I had to turn in with my checked out apron and towels...I had sweated so much that the paper was soaked and nearly falling apart...the girls behind the counter asked me if it was raining...I said no, but it did earlier in the night. I didn't bother to tell them that the paper wasn't soaked from the rain...

I sold 3 cases tonight. A bit better than last night...I'm gonna push for 4 cases tomorrow night...and to make it to work on time.

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
38 Bags of Cracker Jacks
100 Bags of Peanuts
1386 Bottles of Beer

Day 24 - A New Brew

It has been 12 days since my last game that I worked at as beer man.

This week I'm currently in between contract jobs, so beer man is the only job for this week...meaning, the days are free to do fun stuff...like going for a bike ride with no shirt on in Creve Coeur Park and burn my back...fun stuff...actually very relaxing, so no complaints here.

Tonight was a night that I can only describe it as being like a season premiere of a tv show....like Scrubs, E.R. or Grey's Anatomy...there were new guys there tonight...about 6 of them...and it was like the new interns that show up on the season premiere.

All of the regulars were talking and catching up with each other since the last home-stand. Then the newbies showed up...a few of them had no clue on what to do and I remembered back to my first day and how lost I was.

Of course I did a JD monologue in my head as I saw all of the newbies file into Commissary 240.

One of them asked our Commissary manager if she thought he had too much ice in his tub. He then looked at me after she responded and asked me the same question...I looked in his tub which he had his case of beer filled to the top with ice and his bottles of water and soda with ice all around them filled to the top of his tub...I looked up at him and said, "it's not a matter of if it's too much ice, it's a matter of if you can carry it?" Our Commissary manager laughed and said that was exactly what she asked him. He went out about 20 minutes before the first pitch and was back before the game started to dump out a bit of his ice.

Several of us regulars were frustrated because the more guys in our commissary, the less money everyone else makes. It's always nice to have fresh blood though...sometimes...

Tonight's game was fricken hot...and that's not even beginning to describe how much I sweated...I'll spare you the details.

A few times I found myself getting light headed and almost dizzy...so I stopped at the top of a section and drank my water and put a few ice cubes in my hat and down the back of my shirt. And it was only 90! I can't imagine how bad it'll be through July...I'm sure it'd been different too if I was able to sell more than 2 cases of beer. Very slow night tonight.

I'm just gonna go ahead and say that the heat caused everyone to have a bad attitude, because I can't think of any other reason...I'm talking about the fans...

I witnessed a couple get into a fight...they got up and walked to the top of the section and kept going back and forth...not very loud at all though...very intense and just between the two of them...but as a beer man, I was waiting for people to move so I could walk down a section and was overhearing the whole thing...then they decided to walk into Red Bird Club to finish it at a table over a beer...I like to think of it as a 'nothing fight'...thank you Dane Cook!

Another lady decided to have a few choice words towards me because I carded her friend sitting next to her. She couldn't understand why I carded someone who was 7 years past their 21st b-day...I told her I card anyone who looked under 30 and her and her friend took offense to that...I heard the f-bomb dropped a few times after I made the sale...I decided that if she stopped me for another beer later on that I would just tell her she looked damn old and still card bisnitch.

It was a slow night of sales over all...back in the Commissary after last call, the newbies were asking if tonight was a normal night and how much everyone sells on a typical night. One guy who stood in front of me in the line to check out had been retired and just wanted something to do and said he had no clue it was this hard of work to sell beer.

Another newbie behind me, who had only sold one case of beer, asked me several questions about my experiences working there...I explained that tonight was my first night and I sold 5 cases...the look on his face was priceless! I laughed a minute later and told him the truth, that this was my first year and it only gets easier as you go.

Looking forward to tomorrow night's game and figuring out how to further market stlbeerman.com

Totals thus far:
33 Bottles of Water
35 Bags of Cracker Jacks
96 Bags of Peanuts
1312 Bottles of Beer